wahahaha.. tis is gng to b a long long post.. to blog on e happenings of e past few days.. haha.. from where i left off.. tt's fri night!! ( e short random post on sun nt counted.. haha..) n it's tue night now! haha..

hmm.. i shall start w fri night.. haha.. went over to pasir ris to meet them.. hmm.. reached round 9pm.. they finishing up w their steamboat.. hmm... i took e wrong bus.. haha.. cos sw told me another bus no. while e one i checked is 354.. so e bus i took, i suppose to alight at downtown east.. i didnt.. so in e end, i took e whole loop n alight opp downtown east.. n walked quite a bit of distance.. quite dark.. haha.. i carrying laptop n bks.. heavy bag.. haha.. scare ltr ppl rob me of my laptop. haha.. den reach there.. put down things.. den they prepare a bowl of food for me.. i jokingly asked.. is tis e leftovers? haha.. cos they were clearing up mah.. haha.. den after tt, we gathered at e games rm for a tym of worship.. hmm.. i was fighting back tears.. cos it has been a long tym since i worshipped w them.. n i nv thot it was possible to worship w them again.. so it was kind of emotional for me.
after tt.. we had a short sharing.. haha.. n they welcomed e new comers.. n oso welcome me lah.. tis long tym no c sister. haha.. 6 months.. time flies.. haha.. e sharing was nt bad.. it was on a talk they attended in e afternoon.. bout bgr. haha.. den after tt, supose to hv treasure hunt. but everyone's tired.. so some went to slp, some of us went to e games rm.. some played cards n monopoly.. i played e guitar alittle too.. den i started studying at bout 2plus.. till 5am.. but still v awake.. but i noe i need to slp.. so put aside my bks n tried to slp on e couch.. haha.. had prob slping.. haha.. cos air con rm.. i only hv my jacket.. haha.. cover legs, cnt cover hands.. haha.. den 5.30am still awake.. haha.. dunno wat tym i slept.. woke up at 7am.. den v blur.. dunno where i m.. haha.. cos i was facing e window.. haha.. though gt those slides (dunno wat u call it lah.. haha).. but still can c e sky.. so i woke up looking at e clear blue sky.. nice!! haha.. it's a nice feeling to b able to wake up to face e clear blue sky or e sea.. shiok! haha.. den had breakfast.. n den worship again n talk.. left near starting of talk for appointment.. hmm.. didnt really get to say a formal gdbye to them.. but i guess it's gd too.. cos i cant bring myself to.. e walk there was an emotional one.. e walk back was an even more emotional one.. cos i dunno when i'll b meeting up w them again.. it's hard to say gdbye..
hmm.. so in all, i was there for 13hrs.. n i didnt go to e sea-side!! well..e chalet was facing e sea.. n i did get e sea breeze when i was on my way there n back.. but.. i didnt see e sea or stand by it! ah! such a waste.. haha.. enjoying sea breeze yet nt hearing e waves is jus like normal wind loh.. hai.. but mayb it's oso gd tt i dun go to e sea.. haha.. ltr i more emo. haha.

e place is e same place.. everything seems so familar.. yet things have changed.. many things hv changed over these 6 months.. there r new faces.. e ppl r no longer e same.. it feels as though it's a picture.. some of made their exit from tis pic.. n i m one of those.. e atmosphere is no longer e same.. e laughter of some ppl r missing.. i hesitated to go.. i dunno whether i made e right choice.. cos i noe my emotions will b affected.. things r jus nt e same.. everyone hv to move on.. ppl come n ppl leave.. though i did nt feel like a stranger back there.. perhaps cos most of e ppl r still ppl tt i knew for yrs.. n only 6 months hv past.. though common experience n topics hv decreased. though sometimes at a loss of wat to say to each other.. but i still feel tt i belong there.. but tis feeling may b gone in a few more months tym.. i dunno.. tears rolled down as i walked alone, leaving tt place.. but i told myself.. tis aint e tym to cry.. i cant cry now.. haha... i hv stopped myself from crying afew tyms e past few days n wks.. cos i need to study for exams.. crying make my eyes tired. haha.. no tym to cry. haha.. n cant afford to cry.. LOL! haha.. but e tears jus wun listen to me.. haha.. so afew tears did roll down.. but yea.. i managed to nt start crying.. haha.. well.. certain issues can affect me v easily n make me emotional..

went for appointment.. it was fast!! cos no ppl.. everything done in half an hr.. haha.. den went back home.. slept for 2 hrs.. b4 waking up.. check mail den left for js's bdae party.. met lyn, jy, hl earlier.. went to buy choco from ntuc for js's parents.. haha.. lyn n i got a bit high.. n we were laughing.. haha.. den e 2 guys were complaining like how we gals take a long tym to choose simple things.. can jus grab n go.. -.- den we sat down at mac to write e cards.. den danver n lihui joined us there.. n soon after, we headed to js's hse.. brian n evon were already there.. hmm.. there was a joke bout me tt day.. prom dress.. started cos i asked lyn wat she wearing.. den dan was w her.. dan ask her to reply me prom dress.. wanting to c whether i'll really wear my prom dress. -.- now they r making fun of me w 2 things.. receipt (which i spelt as recipe while multi-tasking n talking to hl on msn.. haha).. n e prom dress thingy which is dan's fault.. haha.. there was suppose to b one more.. serveriettes... which i dunno how to spell.. spell till severer or wat lah. haha. js's house is on e 24th floor.. hmm.. from there look down v scary... haha.. we sat outside.. in a circle.. v windy.. abit cold. haha.. we were e first grp to reach n last grp to leave.. haha.. hmm.. we all start to get high after drinking e orange juice.. n joked tt it was drugged.. haha.. dan n hl gt high.. keep laughing n dan's face turned red.. while brian oso started laughing soon after.. jy was stoning.. n e rest of us were oso laughing.. haha.. we played cards too.. pairing up.. i was super blur.. cos of lack of slp.. haha.. we played ROCK.. n i keep losing oso.. cos of slow reaction.. haha.. n a brain tt's nt moving. haha.. cos of e lack of slp, i woke up on sat w my voice sounding different. haha. we oso played 'wo yao chang xia qu'.. n ya.. we forfeitted jy by making him eat jelly w orange juice n nasi lemak chilli.. haha.. a special present of js to him. haha.. n make him sing songs for us. haha. we were all quite crazy.. haha.. guess partly cos of exams stress.. it's like we hv a chance to gather tgt n go crazy n destress n let loose some of our emotions.. haha.. i guess we can do tt cos we r comfortable w each other.. n we noe there's nt a need to hold back.. cos we hv shared many laughter tgt.. n r there w each other thru tough period.. though nt necessary b able to b there right by their side.. but we try to encourage each other.. i thank God for them.. every single one of them.. wonderful friends who have encouraged me in many ways.. n make my scholarship journey so much more colourful, meaningful n e stress more bearable.. cos we r all in it tgt.. n they can understand e stress tt i m gng thru.. haha..

sun i went back to hostel in e afternoon.. haha.. i took a 6hrs slp on sat night.. but woke up feeling more sleepy.. consequence of hving more slp when u hv insufficient slp. haha.. n i kept dozing off during service.. tt's v bad. haha.. i can even slp while standing. haha.. den caught a 2hrs nap after lunch b4 heading back to hostel.. first tym gng back on sun afternoon.. hmm.. spoils my mood again.. haha.. but my roomie was soon back too.. haha.. hmm.. studied for my mon test.. n dinner was delivered for me too.. haha.. cos my roomie ask my block head to help her ta bao.. sui bian help me too.. haha.. n i ate jap food.. haha.. surprisingly. haha.. n sun i ate alot.. compared to e past few days.. haha.. sun i had 2 proper meals w rice. haha.. sat only 1 proper meal w rice, breakfast w 2 piece of bread (ham, cheese n egg mayo).. n teabreak of 2 sausages.. n fri a mac lunch.. n abit for dinner.. haha.. i hv been eating only one or 2 meals.. tis is bad.. e exams period.. hai.. it's so torturing.. mentally n physically.. many tyms i feel like giving up.. n e stress seems to b near breaking pt.. it's bad.. cos i m like studying till super late for it.. i hv never studied till 4plus, 5plus n consistently 3plus.. nt even for A's.. n A's oso like nt SOOO stress. haha.. n physically.. cos of e lack of slp.. i hv been super blur.. slow oso.. in thinking n reacting.. n my appetite was badly affected.. dun feel like eating.. hmm.. i guess e feeling of hunger was so small compared to e feeling of stress.. tt i dun really feel like eating.. even till now, i think i hv abit of a prob finishing a whole plate of rice. hai.. i need to get my appetite back. haha..

after mon's test.. i went to mac area to study.. hmm.. i really cnt finish studying.. it's really bad to hv 3 papers in 2 days.. cos i cnt finish reading is one thing.. cnt memorise everything is another. i was super stressed on mon.. cos for today's 2 papers.. i hv 2 ch of psycho unread at all.. n for 801, i hv nt revise or try e practise qns.. ya.. as there's nt enough tym left, i hv to read e pyp ans instead of trying them out.. n really thanks to my friend for helping me summarise my 2 ch of psycho.. so i dun need to read e txtbk.. i feel so blessed.. but i feel v bad oso.. cos it's my own studies.. i shld b responsible for it n nt ask ppl to help me study.. tis is so bad.. hai.. srsly, i wun let tis situation happen again next sem.. i m gonna rest well, enjoy myself n start studying hard when sem start next yr. right from e start.. but i oso didnt slack alot tis sem loh.. guess i jus hv to study HARDER next sem.. oh well.. cos uni aint easy at all.. much tougher than A's.. hmm.. i survived my day of 2 papers.. srsly, my morale was nt v high.. couldnt wait for it to b over.. n i was totally not confident of my preparations.. feeling stress.. nth is getting in.. n i noe if i dun calm down, i cant think well n do e qns.. hai.. i hv mastered e art of nt thinking bout past papers n concentrate on e coming ones.. but actually i jus push it to e back of my brain.. i m still concerned bout whether my ans r right or nt.. for all e 6 papers, i hv no confident at all.. jc if dun do well.. mayb still can moderate up.. cos my standard is consider slightly above avg in my jc.. but.. in uni.. it's a different case.. uni ppl r quite smart.. n my course is a competitive course. v competitve.. w ppl really smart.. i m e exception.. so most ppl will do well generally.. so i die loh. haha.. if i can get past tis sem n dun need to c boss, it's really by the grace n mercy of God. haha.. i really thanks those ppl who hv been supporting me thru e exams period w words of encouragement.. haha.. it kind of kept me gng.. haha.. i guess nt many of u seen how stress i really was. haha.. well.. sometimes u oso cnt tell.. cos it's internal de.. haha.. today power. haha.. my papers r 1300-1530 n 1700-1900.. haha.. had a packet of biscuit in e morning b4 i left for my papers (kong guan biscuit.. 3 pieces in a packet de.. sugar crackers. ).. den lucky zy (gal) help me buy 2 subway cookie.. if nt i dun need eat lo.. haha.. cos she coming for 801 exam.. den e stupid psycho paper.. took 20mins to collect n tally papers.. in e end, i m left w less than an hr to memorise all e things tt i need to for 801.. -.- i ate my 2 cookies while i flip thru my notes.. haha.. n tt 2 cookies lasted me till 8plus.. haha.. after my papers end, i went out of sch w my friends.. haha.. feel so gd to leave e sch!!! haha.. i like to take 179 now.. cos it means i m gng OUT of sch.. haha.. lol.. 199 sometimes oso. haha.. den went jurong pt ntuc xtra.. haha.. to buy bread, ham n cheese for tml picnic! haha.. my first tym buying ham from ntuc.. n my first tym making ham n cheese bread.. haha.. shld b easy n chicken feat right? haha.. jus put everything n cut.. haha.. so barker.. u r e first grp to eat sandwiches made by me! haha..

hmm.. den i decided to reward myself w a cup of bubble tea.. haha.. n all e lack of slp hv made me weak too.. haha.. i'll sneeze a few tyms these days.. n jus now.. i carry e stuff from ntuc.. 600g of bread, 500g of ham n 750g of cheese.. i find it a bit heavy.. weak lah.. haha.. but i was carrying a fat bag n my laptop too.. haha.. plus e bubble tea on hand.. no hand lo.. haha.. lucky nt raining.. haha.. sit down in bus so ma fan.. no place to place my stuff. haha.. hmm.. gt back home round 9pm.. haha.. so i hv nt ate anything except 1 packet of biscuits, 2 subway cookie n bubble tea since 9.45am till 9.. infact.. only biscuits from 9.45 till 8.15pm.. woah.. haha.. my friend say gd for losing weight. but hmm.. nt tis way.. haha.. n e food i ate were fattening too.. haha.. i m happy w e weight i took recently on sat.. during my appointment.. but nt happy w my height!!! ah.. i m getting shorter.. !!! haha.. hmm.. i wanna exercise during e hol.. haha.. i wan to keep fit.. haha.. i wan to do lots of things.. haha.. will enjoy myself FULLY n relax n rest.. b4 e results r out.. haha.. hmm.. i'll miss my lappy n internet when i m away.. haha.. there's catching up to do w different grps of ppl.. things to plan.. next sem time table too.. n guitar!!! ah.. 3 yrs of picking up guitar.. but it's heading nowhere.. who wanna help me by teaching me? haha.. n srsly.. 3 papers in 2 days.. is bad.. n w no tym to eat between 2 papers.. hai.. srsly, how do i even go for an exam in such conditions? nt prepared content wise.. nt prepared physically (nt enough slp n food).. etc.. haha.. when i finished my last paper.. there were nt much of an excitement.. guess i was too tired.. or i noe i didnt do well for all.. or e stress hv make me dunno wat le.. haha.. i dun even feel much of a relieve.. perhaps tensed up for long? haha.. dunno.. exams spread over 3 wks is bad too.. 3 papers in 2 wks n another 3 in 2 days.. madness.. n 6 papers in total.. n tis is only sem 1.. yr 1.. hai.. wateva.. it's over n done w.. for now.. haha.. i shall STOP thinking bout it.. n enjoy.. haha.. i shall nt shortchange myself in enjoying myself.. haha..

now exams over.. haha.. i can cont thinking bout things.. haha.. tt i keep telling myself dun think bout during exams period.. cnt get distracted then.. n supposingly, i can cry le.. haha.. but nope.. nt crying now. haha.. hmm.. till i emo again bah.. haha.. nt crying cos i m meeting barker tml!! haha.. NEXT UP: BARKER GATHERING!!! a day of fun n laughter n wonderful memories.. haha.. was planning for tis during my preparation for exams n during my exams.. lol! haha.. but it's a source of motivation for some of us to get thru those exams.. haha.. i wrote on fb today tt those exams r NIGHTMARES.. now it's tym to embrace e DREAMS.. haha.. ok.. tml is a long day.. haha.. but i'll enjoy myself.. b4 i head off for m'sia on thur.. tml is picnic n steamboat! w photo competition. haha.. excited!! haha.. tml will b a gd memory. haha.. ok.. shall end tis super long post here.. update tml memories tml night.. haha..