tis post can b given a miss.. haha..

wat does it means to b moving on from an unhappy incident? does it means looking back w/o feeling hurt or sad? does it mean forgetting bout e whole incident? hmm.. i dunno.. but u cnt deny tt e incident did happen.. n no matter how hard u tried, it's etched in ur memory.. perhaps a corner.. but it's still there.. n hurts r emotional scars.. perhaps as tym goes by, e hurt will fade.. perhaps after moving on, u will b able to look back at the incident as another event in ur life.. u wun feel sad over it anymore.. but tis take tym... is it possible to still b happy while letting e hurts in u heal? sounds hard n difficult.. but hving God in my life n w me thru everything, i hv EVERY reason to rejoice even during tough times..

there are many outlets to express our feelings.. b it when we r stressed, angry, sad, happy, etc.. they r supposed to make u feel better.. but sometimes they may make u feel worse.. haha.. cos e outlet may make u feel tired.. so perhaps it's better accompanied by a gd slp? haha.. i dunno.. tried b4.. but e after-effect is nt v gd.. haha.. well.. e best outlet is still to hv a gd talk w God first. hmm.. shall try other outlets after talking to God another tym.. hai..

wat does it means to b an emotional person? hmm.. means tt e person is filled w a lot of emotions.. happy, sad, etc.. easy to feel for things.. affected by mood n ppl around him/her.. haha.. crapping..

really really wanna play badminton today.. feel like smacking shuttecocks.. haha.. no lah.. jus hitting it.. haha.. was informed near 7pm tt meeting will b at 10pm.. so tempted to join them.. but i shall b in e right frame of mind.. cos if i go, i hv to leave by 8.45pm.. tt means 45 mins of playtime.. no.. shorter than tt.. cos if i leave here round 7pm.. i may only reach round 8.15.. so 30 an hr of playtime n 2.5 hrs of travelling? nono.. though i really tempted to do so.. really.. but i shall force myself to be sane.. ok..

Labels: random thots

hmm.. final exam r less than a mth away.. really no tym le.. first paper.. 19 nov..

m snacking on koko krunch now.. find myself abit childish.. but who cares.. haha.. who say koko krunch, honey stars, etc r only 4 kids? haha.. i start to wonder whether i can b childish nt.. haha.. i hv reached a age tt i hv to b responsible 4 myself.. my words n actions.. no more excuses like.. aiya.. she's still a kid.. still childish.. let it go la.. dun hold it against her.. nope.. tt doesnt happen anymore..

given a choice, which will i choose? being childish or mature? if u choose to b childish n seen as 1, ppl will nt pay much attention to u n wat u say.. somewat u will b ignored n hv no say.. n ppl wun place high hopes on u.. but does tt mean tt ppl will b more forgiving when u err? mayb..

if u choose to b mature, somewat u hv to 'uphold' tt image. n ppl may b more critical when u err.. can u still let ur hairs down? i dunno..

hmm.. so how? haha.. a mature person may hv a childish side too.. haha..can we jus b ourselves? b childish at tyms but mature when need to b? can we jus once in a blue moon throw a 'tantrum' like a child? behave like one? w/o much worries n cares.. nt caring bout how others may look or judge at us?? hard.. e world is judgemental.. n ppl dun hv much patience w an adult kid.. hai..

dunno wat i m typing.. haha.. a bit gng rouund in circles.. no conclusion.. hai..

Labels: random thots

on my way out of sch today, quite funny.. haha.. cos during peak hrs, there's 179 n 179A.. 179A wun stop outside NTU.. as in pioneer station all these.. it will jus drive past n stop only at boon lay interchange.. somewat express bus.. haha.. i like tt.. haha.. but sometimes students forgot which they board..cos many buses will come at e same tym.. so when reaching pioneer station, students will press e bell.. n realised tt e bus dun stop.. n come to realise tt they board 179A... haha.. today, wat's funny is nt tis.. haha.. my friends n i took e last 179A.. tt means infront of us gt a few bus.. 179 n 179A.. den reaching pioneer station, only 2 lanes.. so quite crowded, den e bus infront of us, 179A was turning in to e bus stop, blocking our road, cos no space to turn.. den i was like 'isnt tt a 179A, y is it stopping here?'... but cos sometimes e bus no at e back is different from e front.. so i wait till our bus pass by e bus n i saw tt it's really 179A.. den i was like discussing w my friends y did it stop there? n my friends say, mayb e driver oso confused/forgot which service he driving.. den ppl press, he stop loh.. dunno.. haha.. den reach e traffic light near e bus stop, our bus n another 179 (which was actually at e bus stop infront of e 179A) stopped next to each other.. den e drivers open e window n door n communicate across.. dunno wat they shouting oso.. haha.. but they were signalling n talking bout y e driver of e other 179A stop there.. haha.. so funny... haha..

went to lot 1 w ht to buy presents.. i intend to buy my correction tape, some shorts, some shirts, etc.. but manage to get none.. haha.. met 2 ppl at lot 1.. hmm.. felt weird talking to them.. hv mixed feelings.. some which i dun like... hmm.. after buying e presents, waited for my friend to board e bus, den i walk home.. decided to walk home to save money.. haha.. oso cos long tym didnt walk there le.. haha.. n i need tym to think bout some things which surfaced again due to tt 'meeting'...

those who noes pretend they dun.. n when we meet up, there seems to b an invisible barrier.. things r nt e same.. n wun b e same.. i jus hv to face it.. sometimes there seems to be pretentious or mayb i think too much.. e topic is avoided.. mayb tis is e best way... so tt we wun feel awkward? or bring up issues tt we shld jus leave it? i dunno.. n tt thing still matter.. to ppl around me.. to my parents too.. but i thot i knew it since some tym back? hai..

w regards to tt incident, i did nt do anything wrong.. i can ans to God.. so i dun need to feel like i m in e wrong or wat... i can hold my head high.. ah.. but y do i feel weird.. hai.. walk in e light.. wen xin wu kui.. my life is answerable to God... as long as i can ans God, knowing tt i hv nth to hide, jiu can le.. hai...

my bag was quite heavy.. shoulder pain.. haha.. reached home.. parents were 'complaining' to me how 'powerful' my ah kong's cigarettes r.. ah.. he coming back le.. i need more fresh air.. can i store fresh air somewhere??? ah.. my nose.. my health.. my breathing..

'chemical warfare' have started.........

Labels: random thots

'Don't leave room for regrets'

can be interpretated in 2 ways.
1st: (with regards to the past)
don't leave any room or space in your heart or mind to entertain the thots of regret. that means dun look back at things and regret.

2nd: (with regards to the future)
work hard and don't regret cos u noe u gave ur best n u work hard for it.

though one is with regards to e past n another e future, but it starts now.. at e present.. whether we wan to live life w no regrets..

ppl often hv regrets in their life.. to live a life w no regrets seems impossible.. ppl often look back in life n sighed.. n think.. 'if i hv done tt, if i hv done tis, etc..'.. indeed.. we do hv 'regrets' in our life.. but we can choose to put these aside n nt let it affect us.. tt means dun keep a space in our heart/mind for it.. let it past..let it fade away.. try looking at it from a different angle.. if tt thing hv nt happened tt way, will it teach u a certain lesson? or help u grow in a certain way? eg.. regretting nt treasuring a friend enough will make us treasure those around us more now.. or regretting nt doing well in a test will make us ensure tt we wun make e same mistake again for e next test.. if these 'regrets' did nt take place, things n we may nt b e way we r now.. whether gd or bad, we all hv lessons in life to learn.. life is a module that is never ending till we breathe our last breadth.. n e things to learn r up till we r old.. n we will still b students of life.. haha..

k.. i dunno wat got into me.. haha.. anw, when i woke up tis morning, received an sms from my cgl.. asking me to b e worship leader during cell tis sat.. haha.. hmm.. a bit nt confident.. nt e first tym i led worship.. but it's e first tym in eng n here in tis cg.. haha.. n it has been more than a yr since i led worship bah.. haha.. though e eng songs i noe r limited but i do hv a few in mind le.. haha.. jia you.. :)

Labels: random thots

terrible leh.. singaporeans.. aiyo.. some r selfish.. hai.. no giving up of seats to elderly.. n injured ppl.. it's e eldery giving up e seats to e elderly.. wat is tis? n hor.. i stood all e way from tiong bahru to cck.. no one offered me a seat.. at jurong east, when everyone rush for e seat, ppl even snatch my seat.. fine.. c i young.. dun give me seat.. k.. i'll jus take it tt u didnt c my feet... but so many ppl.. none c meh??? i stood infront of e pirority seat.. no use... is it nt obvious enough? perhaps i shld stand in e middle next tym.. n nt at e side.. den MAYBE ppl will c.. there was a seat at bukit gombak.. but i didnt take it.. cos only one stop left le.. n later by e tym i walk there, someone else take it again.. n tt empty seat is nt cos ppl give it up.. is cos ppl alight.. aiyo... terrible..

yay.. watching liu xin hua yuan again.. a few wks didnt watch le.. haha... well.. my schedule gt a bit messed up cos of my leg........ hai.. but like dunno whether is i say or mun jee say first de.. we all hv to b responsible for our own actions n for our ownself.. haha..

when the sun goes down,
and the sky turns dark.
when people leave,
and lights are out.
when you are left alone,
and you looked into your heart.
God is there like He was since the start.

people come into our life and they make their exit one day.. that day may be the next day, days later, weeks later, months later, years later.. we dunno when the day is.. but everyone will make their exit some day.. so who can be there thru out? aiyo.. i think i listen to e song too much le.. haha.. most inspiration from e lyrics of tt song.. noe which few lines i refering to? haha..

Labels: random thots

thank you yan ting for e offer.. :) haha..

we went to executive cafe to hv buffet lunch today.. e food quite nice.. but nt worth e money.. -.-

friends were v nice.. walking a different way to suit me.. haha.. n using lifts more.. haha.. well.. it's really bad to jay-walk when u cant walk fast.. but i m lucky today.. cos morning shuttle bus, bus driver waited for me.. though i nt running for it.. haha.. rarely leh.. den on way home, i walked fast.. oso can catch e bus. yay. haha.. blessed.. :)

i paid attention during my mas111 lect.. but 80percent only.. cos i falling asleep.. haha.. but i still cant understand some of e things.. den we were trying to figure out.. it's on sets.. den me n zy(boi) discussing y an area is shaded.. den b4 he say, i say 'mei you mei you become you' (dun hv dun hv become hv).. haha.. actually he wan say in a more maths term de.. (negate, negate become true).. haha.. but we dunno our logic correct nt lah.. haha.. ah!!!

k.. tis is RANDOM inspiration...
will you be there?
will you be there to pick me up when i fall?
will you be understanding when i am unreasonable?
will you be patient when i make mistakes?
will you be forgiving when i hurt you?

will you be there to walk quiety beside me?
will you be there to stand by me when everyone left?
will you be believing me when i do not even believe in myself?
will you be there with me through the ups and downs of life?

ah.. tis srsly need some refining.. wateva.. no more inspiration to improve le.. haha.. so leave it as tt.. ah! aiyo.. y i in such a 'frustrated' mood? hai..

Labels: random thots

ok.. i'll stop my crapping n settle down to blog bout today.. eh.. like i say.. nt enough slp.. haha.. meeting zhiying (boy) to go for psycho lect.. took shuttle bus to innovation centre.. den e bus did nt stop at e bus stop.. cos no one boarding n no one press e bell.. reason for no one pressing e bell: we cant find e bell.. lol! den we jus c as e bus go past e stop.. next stop is at spms.. finally someone found e bell.. so alot of us alighted at spms there.. aiya.. e driver oso de.. innovation centre sure gt ppl alight de.. n normally alot of ppl.. cos there's e place to alight if we going to north spine.. aiyo.. den i already abit late le.. den hv to walk so far w my heavy bag n my laptop.. heavy bag cos all my stuff tt i bringing home is inside.. haha..

k.. after psycho lect.. is programming lesson.. which i use to crap for my previous posts.. haha.. today's psycho lect end early.. so dun need teleport.. haha.. n after we reach, we still can go buy old chang kee.. haha.. den after programming, is lunch den foundation in maths.. haha.. go in late.. so no place to sit.. hv to sit e first row.. lol! stress leh.. cnt fall asleep.. n e lecturer may ask u qn.. haha.. so i didnt use laptop.. but i v happy. cos tis is e 3rd lect on foundation maths.. finally moving away from those 'traditional' proving.. haha.. gng into truth table.. haha.. again, i c 0 n 1.. haha.. but tis lect i understand leh!!! haha.. finally.. haha.. so happy.. in uni.. able to understand lect is nt smth to b taken for granted.. it's smth tt u can b proud of n give urself a pat on e back.. haha.. congrats! haha.. congrats to my friends who understand too! haha.. but it's jus e beginning.. i think e tough part haven come yet.. haha.. n thanks.. i gt e news tt my 3 maths core e mid-term exam is on e same day.. so on 10 oct, i'll hv 3 (THREE) mid-term papers.. n it's a sat.. zzzz. hai.. die..

ya.. after lect, we decided to go print some notes.. as we walk past e computer shop, my friend ask me to go check whether e ms office has arrived.. i went in n ask.. they told me actually e stocks r in le n ask me whether i hv e invoice w me.. but i dun.. it's in my hostel.. i was kind of pissed n irritated lah.. stocks come le oso dun inform us or paste a notice.. if i didnt ask, i mus wait till when... n i dunno how long e stocks hv been here.. how i wish i can rush back to hostel to take e invoice n collect den n there.. but it's near e closing tym la.. n go back hostel is quite a hassle.. n i hv tuition.. hai.. u noe how irritating it can b to wan smth badly n e thing is right infront of u or near u, yet u cnt get it??? hai.. den after printing stuff, leave e sch w my friends.. hv to miss afew buses.. cos too packed.. den finally gt on le.. n e guy next to me smell of cigarettes.. zzzz.. e guy was sitting on my left.. zhiying (boy) was sitting on my right.. he can smell it too... imagine how much more i m smelling it.. hai.. den my file e opening thingy dropped.. i dunno wat dropped initially, so i wan to bend down n look.. n as i was bending forward, i knocked my forehead against e pole.. LOL..tis is wat happens when i m nt having enough slp.. haha.. i get accident-prone.. blur.. etc.. haha.. n my friends saw tt i knocked my forehead.. lol.. haha..

went for tuiton at woodlands.. yay! bought a pencil box le.. haha.. i like it a lot. i saw e wallet series of tt design first.. den i was hoping tt there will b e pencil box series too.. haha.. indeed, there is! haha.. i bought dark brown de.. actually was thinking black, den white, den brown. haha.. there's oso e laptop bag series.. but tey dun look shock-resistent.. haha. anw, it's v nice.. haha. e brand is ICON PU by U2ME.. haha bought at popular.. i like it cos e words on it is 'Never Give Up'.. haha.. indeed.. i wanna buy e pens tt i use for my note making.. but i realised there was a great increase in price.. haha.. from 95cents last yr to $1.20 now.. lol.. i m nt buying.. haha.. i'll subsitute it.. haha. econs sia.. haha.. ya.. n as i was waiting for my tutee, i ran into jian lin.. haha.. i think tis month 2 time run into him at woodlands area le.. lol.. haha.. he jus book out.. haha..

ok.. here is a chinese compo tt i wrote when i m in j1.. i like it alot.. some ppl may find it naggy or wat cos of e repetitive words.. but to me.. repetitive words r a form of expression.. to make emphasize on some emotions/feelings.. haha.. i dunno.. i wrote many essays in j1.. but tis is e only piece tt i m v proud of.. haha.. u guys can give ur comments on it at e tagboard after reading it.. haha..

断了线的友情

风轻轻地吹着， 雨细细地下着，我孤独地走着。我的视线被雨水和泪水给模糊了。我感到好冷，好冷。我望着天空，望着那无边无际的天空。在这么大的天空下，我竟是如此的渺小。在这么大的世界里，我却找不到容身之处。

街上一个人影也没有。雨继续地下着，我继续地走着。 人都跑到哪里去了？我的好友，你在哪里？难道真的剩下我一个吗？ 为什么你要这样对我？我到底做错了什么？为什么不给我机会就走了呢？为什么？

我的心好疼， 好疼。我从口袋里拿出那封信。拿出那无情的信。我把信掀开，停下沉重的脚步，低着头，把信从头地读过。这就结束了吗？这么多年的感情说完就完吗？这么多年的坚持和付出就这样结束了吗？不，我绝不容许这样的结局。绝对不可以！

你好残忍，你好无情，你好自私。因别人所说的一句话，你就不信我， 也不给我解释的机会。你总是认为你是对的。你为什么不信我呢？难道你还不懂我的人吗？你让我好失望，好失望。

我打给你，你不接，写信给你，你不看，叫你，你不应。我还上门去找你，你却不开门，也不理我。我的手，敲门敲到红肿了。我的声音叫你，叫到哑了， 你还是连一次的机会都不肯给我。你就像玫瑰上的刺，把我的心给刺伤了。

我应该继续坚持下去吗？你知道我很爱面子，却愿意如此地低声下气去找你。那是因为我不愿意失去你。你对我是如此的重要，而我对你是如何的呢？我感到好累，好累，好想放弃。

既然我们都要升上高中了，既然我们都要分开了，既然事情已到了这地步，就算了吧。

升上高中后，你我都会认识新朋友，或许很快就会把彼此给忘了吧。那时，你走你的独木骄，我走我的阳光道。这段友情就这祥结束吧。

我松开我的手，那封信就飘落在地。风继续地吹着，雨继续地下着，我继续地走着。。。　。。。

well.. w regards to my previous post today.. on some thots tt i shared.. well.. i was thinking bout some things.. in my life, i hv my fair share of close friends.. friends tt i was v close to.. n i thot our relationship will last.. i thot tt i cnt imagine life w/o em.. but friends, even e closest do part.. n they may drift apart.. all e thots tt no matter wat happens, we'll hold on to e friendships.. they all seems like lies... how many close friends relationships lasted for more than 7yrs.. nope.. sadly.. sometimes these type of things jus make one lose confident in relationships.. i rmb tt after p6, after my first encounter w best friend, i told myself.. no, i m nt gonna get another best friend for myself.. well.. tt was such a thot for a young kid.. but srsly.. y bother to hv best friends when one day e relationship will end? i dunno.. i hv no ans.. i noe tis is a pessimistic view.. but i believe tt GOd put different ppl at different pts in our life.. they are part of our life at a certain pt. accompanying us thru some stages in life n being there to share in ur joy n sorrow.. they r in our life to teach us things n show us things.. though relationship may nt last n when it's tym to let go, there's nth we can do to stop them for leaving.. but well.. i guess wat we can do is to enjoy wat relationships we hv now.. enjoy e friendship. b a gd friend.. n ya.. treasure e moments.. tt's all i can say.. hai.. i v pessimistic leh.. i dunno.. these r jus my views.. u can disagree..

Labels: random thots

haha.. now during e programming lect again.. haha.. no lect slides again.. cos tis tym he didnt upload.. haha.. feeling hungry.. haha.. though jus ate a crab on stick nugget from old chang kee.. haha.. oh.. it's break now.. haha.. so fast.. haha.. i only learnt one thing today.. nt bad.. at least gt one thing.. haha.. jus now pscyho lect is energy sapping again.. haha.. me n zhiying switched off at round e same slide.. haha.. i start writing notes again on my slide, den i turn to look at his.. his is empty.. haha.. tt means he switched off too.. haha. n he's next to me reading wat i m typing now.. haha.. ok.. as can be seen from e no of 'haha' in my post today.. my mood is slightly better le.. haha.. e hot shower jus day helped a bit.. haha.. n e sleep last night.. but i dun hv enough slp again! :( 3am.. wanted to sleep at 11.30pm.. end up chatting w friends.. n thanks for counting e no of 'haha' in my post ytd.. haha.. n for trying to cheer me up.. thanks 4 my roomy for coming back to e room at 3am ytd.. disturbing my slp.. haha..

ok.. here is some thots tt i wan to blog on.. scribbed it down tis morning so tt i can type it down now.. warning: it's kind of total switch of mood.. so u can skip it too.. haha..

In life, ppl tends to prioritise their relationships unknowingly. it's a silent decision made tt sometimes they themselves r unaware of it. To those relationships tt they give higher priority, they'll commit more, give more of themselves n naturally expect more. But with expectations also come disappointment n when u give more of urself, u will b hurt more n deeper. Human relationships r bound to disappoint. But does tis means tt we shld stop giving so much of ourselves into relationships n trying to sustain relationships? no, cos if we dun even try, e relationship will nt last at all n will b bound to fail. at least if u tried, e relationship may cont though disappointments cnt b avoided. not all in e relationship may think e same way as u or b as committed to it as u, afterall, tis relationship may nt b their top priority. but wat can we do? we can only play our small part in keeping e relationship tt we value n hope tt others will value tis relationship n help in sustaining it too.

well.. some ppl give family top priority, others friendships, others bgr.. for me, i oso prioritise my relationships w some ppl.. but i guess there needs to b some balancing.. as in cnt sacrifice other relationships.. ya.. i'll still b doing my part.. cos i really value e friendships.. enough of hi bye friends.. i wan friendships tt last.. n true friends r hard to come by..

Labels: random thots

k.. first an update for those who wanna noe.. went for my eye checkup today.. they removed e protective lense n a stitch.. still hv stitches left.. haha.. they numbed my eye n use a needle to take up.. for once, i m glad tt my right eye cant c.. cos it's already a bit scary to think of how it's done n to c e needle approaching my right eye w my left eye.. haha.. n doc cut down my dosage of eye drops.. n my next appointment is in a month's time.. yea. haha.

ok.. starting my random blogging.. k.. was thinking bout some things these few days.. so ya.. jus some random thots.. may seems emo... haha.. cos i m oso an emo person.. haha..

i dun like ppl to lie to me.. whether on purpose or nt.. jus dun like lies.. prefer ppl to b truthful.. but hard to find ppl who r truthful.. cos ppl will use lies to cover up for things tt they dun wan others to noe.. but i feel tt in relationships w ppl, truthfulness is v impt.. yea.

regrets.. many ppl hv been asking me whether i regretted certain things nt.. i hv been asking myself too.. regret choosing ntu over nus? regret making tt decision? regret blah blah blah.. many things hv happened tis yr.. my life hv changed.. my thinkings hv changed too.. n more things r still to come as i enter uni, stay in hostel etc.. well.. i did regret choosing ntu abit cos of barker.. everyone's in nus.. n i wanna b part of e fun there.. n i told myself.. if my tt decision cause others to suffer, i will regret.. cos it's my own decision.. n others r innocent yet they hv to bear e consequence w me.. it's unfair for em.. but i m telling myself.. many things r nt within my control.. n regretting doesnt help things.. so wat if i really regret? i cant change e way things r now.. so wat i can do is to look ahead.. n live my life to e best now.. make e most out of things.. things do happen for a reason.. so yea.. look ahead.. dun look back.. dun cry over spilt milk..

i hv 2 songs in mind tt i wanna share.. i shall share one first.. it's a song tt i found on youtube last yr.. it's in canto.. though i dun understand, but gt chinese sub.. haha.. n later i found e eng version though it's a bit different.. i like e song alot.. here's e lyrics for e eng version..

Unreserved love
i've always been told, love won't survive
promises will turn into lies
the world just think love comes and passes through,
it never last pure and true
but i still believe love can last
it's Your unfailing love that gives me rest
You were there when i needed You most,
i never walk all alone

on the Cross You died and took away my curse
love so wonderous no one ever could deserve
Your bleeding hand proves Your love unreserved,
You my greatest joy and treasure on the earth
Make my life a fragrant offering, i prayed
help me Lord to serve You truly everyday,
through tears and joy i give You all my best,
let the whole world know your love and grace

chinese version.. (u can tell tt e lyrics is a bit different.. ) sry but e one tt i found r all in traditional chinese.. no simplified ones..
愛是不保留
常聽說世界愛沒長久　　　哪裡會有愛無盡頭
塵俗的愛只在乎曾擁有　　一刻燦爛便要走
而我卻確信愛是恆久　　　碰到了你已無別求
無從解釋不可說明的愛　　千秋過後仍長存不朽
誰人受痛苦被懸掛在木頭　至高的愛盡見於刺穿的手
看血在流反映愛沒保留　　持續不死的愛到萬世不休
惟求奉上生命全歸主所有　要將一切盡獻於我主的手
我已決定今生再沒所求　　惟望得主稱讚已足夠


hai.. indeed everyone love to be loved n wans to be loved.. by friends.. by family.. by people around u.. it's a sweet feeling.. but i noe tt there's a void in each of our hearts.. n a longing for a love.. tt only God can fill.. jus as we were created for HIm n by Him, only He can fill tt void.. sat's outreach did mentioned tis... 'every new high brings excitement, fascination, obsession, n then emptiness.' yup.. there's more to life than wat it seems.. pls surround me with Your love n fill tt void that only You can fill..

Labels: random thots, Songs: Unreserved love